Guys.
Alan Tudyk is just trolling us all.
I talked before about the inhuman voice talent that is Alan Tudyk. He’s the John Ratzenberger of the new Disney era of animated films. Except, instead of having a distinct, recognizable voice, you can never tell it’s him.
He started off with his Annie-award winning role as King Candy in arguably the movie that kicked off the New Disney Renaissance, Wreck it Ralph (others will say it was Tangled but I will fight those people).
[Big Bro’s note: And she has.]
He then became better known as the completely different sounding yet still hilarious Duke of Weselton in Frozen. Y’know, the guy best known for shouting “It’s WESSEL-TON, NOT WEASEL-TON”.
Which Tudyk totally threw in our faces in Zootopia by playing a literal weasel named Duke Weaselton. Adding insult to injury, he even corrected Judy Hopps by telling her it was pronounced “Wea-sel-ton.”
That was our first clue that Alan Tudyk was straight up messing with us.
This was right after he played your basic nasal-sounding corporate schmuck character in Big Hero 6 in ANOTHER UNRECOGNIZABLE VOICE.
Look, Hank Azaria is arguably the greatest voice actor of our time. Yet I still know when it’s him. I never know when it’s Alan Tudyk. Except when he’s trolling me as a goddam weasel.
But I thought I could catch him in Moana. Hey, it’s a movie set in Polynesia, a white guy should stick out like Matt Damon in a movie about the Great Wall of China, right?
Wrong. Couldn’t find him. Credits roll. I cave and go onto IMDB. Maybe he wasn’t in this movie after all?
Oh no. He’s in it.
AS A GODDAM CHICKEN.
HE’S THE VOICE OF THE ROOSTER HEIHEI.
AS IN “HEY. I’M ALAN TUDYK AND I’M HERE TO FUCK UP YOUR BRAIN.”
STOP IT ALAN TUDYK. WE KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING.
At this rate, we’re all gonna be that rooster.
Go see Moana, guys.
