Kill, Marry, Refurb: Disney Animated Songs

Alright, you know the drill. We’re making judgments about things we have no control over because fangirl.

And this month we’re judging the beloved songs from Disney’s animated films!

Oh god. This one was hard…there’s just so many…

Let’s play!

Kill- When Will My Life Begin? from Tangled

Alan Menken, ladies and gentleman. The man who brought you Under the Sea and Beauty and the Beast presents…

…literally a list of chores. In an annoying pop voice. There’s phoning it in, Alan, and then there’s dumping a deuce onto your legacy. Guess which one this one is?

Refurb- Let it Go from Frozen

Yes, this song is amazing and perfect and 9 months of overuse later I am still not sick of it HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE.

But…in terms of how this song is used in the movie…it doesn’t completely make sense. It’s almost…dare I say it? Unnecessary. It’s rightfully an 11:00 number, but it happens in the first half of the movie, and focuses on the supporting character. It would be perfect if this was a movie about Elsa embracing her true identity. But it’s not. It’s a movie about Anna trying to reconnect with her sister. So if the movie was paced and focused differently, the song would fit much better and have an even bigger impact. Maybe something to consider for the Broadway adaptation, Bobby and Kristen? Besides, as much as we love Anna, people would much rather follow Elsa’s fascinating story than Anna’s.

Marry — I’ll Make a Man Out of You from Mulan

Try and listen to this song without singing along. I dare you. It’s actually the best. It solves most life problems. Need to get pumped up? Play this song. Want to dance but don’t feel you have the moves? Play this song. Need to have an emotional bonding experience with your awkward carpool friend? Play. This. Song. It never fails.

Plus the subtle commentary on gender roles is totally awesome.

Honorable Mention- I Wanna Be Like You from Jungle Book

For basically all the same reasons. Plus this version is just amazeballs.