The Only Acceptable Plot Lines for Frozen 2

We all knew this was coming, guys. But I don’t know if any of us were quite prepared.

And I think this pretty much summarizes the Disnerd reaction:

Screen Shot 2015-03-12 at 6.23.12 PM

Yeah, Disney is returning to the sequel game. And, although they’ve regained my trust in a lot of ways, they have not yet earned back the sequels rights. So, the following are the only acceptable plots that would make me actively look forward to Frozen 2: The Quest for More Merchandise.

1. Elsa Joins the Avengers

elsa and the avengers

Forget dinky little ice skates, finally Elsa can put her powers to real use.

Or, if we wanna go a lil’ darker…

2. Elsa Joins the Dark Side and becomes the new Darth Vadar.

I mean, after a lifetime of suppressing your most innate quality because your parents taught you that it was dangerous and shameful? I’d wanna kick a little ass.

elsa dark side

This could also double as the next Star Wars movie.

Continuing down the villain route I love so much…

3. Elsa finds Ariel, Aurora, and Snow White, and finishes the job.

evil elsa

I’ll get you for perpetuating harmful partriarchal ideals!

Or, if you aren’t quite as sadistic as I am…how about a comedy?

[Big Bro’s note: For the sake of humanity I hope no one is as sadistic as you.]

4. Elsa and Marshmallow pair up in unlikely-buddy-cop duo.

the heat frozen

I’d watch the hell out of this movie.

[Big Bro’s note: Throw in Sven as the police chief and I’m there.]

Actually, you know what I’d really like to see?

5. A 90 minute apology for Disney’s God Awful Live Action Reboots and Pixar’s Perpetual Sequel Problem

elsa apologizes

Because no one wants two companies that squander their talents and enormous potential on half-assed sequels.

Except for Incredibles 2. Cuz that’s gonna be awesome.

But, let’s face it, Disney wants to sell merchandise. So it will probably be 90 minutes of Elsa trying on fabulous dresses that you can purchase for yourself and your doll, while Idina belts out high E flats, and Olaf dances around a lot.

Actually, that sounds kind of awesome.

elsa dressolaf dancing

What plot lines would make Frozen 2 acceptable to you?


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  • Becky @Disney in your Day

    Ha! “90 minutes of Elsa trying on fabulous dresses that you can purchase for yourself and your doll, while Idina belts out high E flats, and Olaf dances around a lot” sounds like it might be better than some of the things they come up with…

  • Steve

    Frankly, we all know, from a moneymaking standpoint, that plot doesn’t matter, because we’re all going to see it. I am, as sure as the sky is blue. If it improves upon the first in any way, I’ll be happy.

    Of course, they really can’t afford to half-ass it, because they’ve built up a good, sequel-less reputation with their animated films, and if they ruin that now, credibility will drop even lower.

    On the bright side, if they do get this one right, that means possible follow-ups to movies that may deserve sequels more than Frozen (even if they wouldn’t be as profitable), such as Big Hero 6, where they could focus more on the whole team (rather than mostly Hiro and Baymax) and maybe improve some characters *cough*honeylemon*cough,* or Wreck-it Ralph, just because it’s the best Disney movie in the past five years from my perspective.

    So, to summarize my long-winded point: The plot doesn’t need to be good to make money, the plot should be good to uphold the reputation, and if “Frozen 2” is all-around successful, then maybe other (at least) equally-deserving movies might get sequels.

    • LeahIsMagical

      Well said, sir!

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