Disney March Madness: Round Two

We’re back, and the victors of the last round are ready to throw around some folding chairs and rattle some cages. Let’s take a look at our bracket.

bracket round 2

Hercules vs Mulan



Ooh, this matchup is interesting. Mulan’s a clever fighter but has got a puny lil’ frame. Herc’s got bigger muscles than Superman and Popeye’s baby, but he’s dumb as dirt. Brains versus brawn: who will win out? As much as I’d like to say brains would win the day…the guy who can lift my house with one arm wins. Mulan may have a few tricks up her sleeve but it won’t be long before she tires herself out. Sorry Mulan, you are my gruh foreva, but Herc is the hero. Yes indeed.

Mufasa vs Stitch

http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lqh2gwKNV91qhe4xn.jpg Yes, I realize that's Simba. But too cute to pass up.

Yes, I realize that’s Simba. But it was too cute to pass up.

Ah, it’s close! So very close! Mufasa is…Mufasa! He’s the ultimate papa bear! You do NOT mess with him; he’s got the lion’s share of brute strength. Except Stitch is just as strong as Mufasa plus he has an alien laser gun and is not afraid to use it. Oh and he’s also a super genius with a hazy idea of morality. Oh, God this kills me. I hate to see Mufasa fall off the cliff again but…Stitch wins this round. Long live the king.

I’ll leave you to your tears.

Now on to the villain side of the arena.

Chesire Cat vs Jafar



Who has the creepiest smile and…..go! Oh, that’s too close to call. Guess we’ll have to settle it with hand to hand combat. Sure, Chesire Cat defeated the Devil himself last round, but I don’t think Jafar has the same loophole Achilles Heel as Chernabog. Chesire Cat is a slippery little devil and might elude Jafar’s attacks for a while, but he has no real weapons in his arsenal to use against Jafar. Eventually one of Jafar’s sorcerer spells will snag that little bugger and he’ll be blasted back to Wonderland. Jafar wins!

Maleficent vs Hades



There are going to be a lot of pyrotechnics in this showdown. We’ve got the Lord of the Underworld versus a full blown dragon animagus (or sorceress, whatever). Actually, these two might kill each other off in the first few minutes. They’re pretty equally matched! Except, I think Maleficent just wants it more. Hades seems a bit more chill about his evil doings than Maleficent. Sure, he still gets stuff done, but in a tight race like this one, a twisted follow through can make all the difference. Plus her powers seem to be more variable than Hades, who seems limited to levitation, fire, and electrocution. Nothing to sneeze at, sure, but Maleficent seems to be able to procure anything with that magic stick of hers. In the end, Maleficent would smoke Hades out of the arena. My, what an awkward situation. The mistress of all evil remains undefeated.

So here’s our new bracket folks!bracket final four

Stay tuned for the final four!